One piece of advice given a lot in pediatric speech therapy is to not tell your child “say __”. We know that this may seem confusing when we want the children to be imitating us during therapy, it is important to encourage them in a way that benefits their continued language growth. Here are some key reasons why we give this advice:
- Encouraging initiation in communication
One of our goals in increasing a child’s communication is that they can do it independently. This can be the child using words, using sign, using their AAC device, or pointing to things they want. Being able to communicate with others independently can be a moment of empowerment for them! If we are constantly telling kids what to say, they can become dependent on that cue, “say _”, from us. This means that if a child is told “say help me!”every time they need to ask for help, they might not independently ask. Instead, they might wait for us to tell them what to say. - Kids are stubborn!
One thing we see often in speech therapy for toddlers is how independent they start to become! This can be seen when kids are trying to open something tricky and they’ll refuse to let you help because they are sure they can do it. That independence directly relates to their communication. Being told to say something, even if it gets them what they want, can sometimes discourage them from saying it.
What to say instead!
Here are some things you can do instead of “say____” that speech therapists use every day in speech therapy! - Narrate daily life a.
One way to encourage independent language is to comment on the things your child is doing or seeing in the world around them. Things like “you put it in!” or “the car goes fast!”. Phrases like this can create opportunities for the child to imitate them when they see them happening again around them! - “You can say___” a.
Instead of creating the demand of “say help me”, you are creating a suggestion of “you can say help me!”. This takes some of the pressure off of our kids and allows them to still hear that verbal model, but not demand an immediate imitation.